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03 July 2010 @ 07:52 pm
The host, second chapter  
In this chapter of the host, Wanderer, the soul, pretends to be asleep because she's scared and we get to hear the Seeker and the Healer bitchfight information at us.



I’m so mad at this chapter! Why? More of the same happen! This chapter is basically this:



Yes, the writing is less purple, but so repetitive! Plus if I hear Ford one more time about how sensitive Wanderer is I will put my foot so far up his ass that I’ll play soccer with his tonsils.

Here’s what you need to know:

1) Seekers are human hunters, apparently, seeking rebels to crush them to end the war with the horrible humans. Now that they are possessed the world is a better place. The seeker we meet is a expy of Jane and the ever sensitive Ford hates her.
2) Ford calls the soul Wanderer because she is so brave and wonderful.
3) All arguments are mankind’s fault (because we suck). You see, these bugs share one mind and thus always got along. Now that they took over our bodies, our ugly emotions are spoiling their day.
4) Also they are not liars, they’re story tellers. See, they make stuff up because its fun and sometimes forget the truth. Honey, I did that in Disney. One day, for fun, I went around the park with my roommate calling her my long lost sister. It’s still a lie!
5) Wanderer starts mind raping the host for answers to give to the Seeker. Turns out she has a cousin and-- mindblock! Wanderer couldn’t read further and she gets super pissed and blames the body for her reaction.


And we end this chapter with the Seeker about to question her.


 
 
 
Feeling: frustratedfrustrated
 
 
 
zelda_queenzelda_queen on July 4th, 2010 02:26 am (UTC)
XD Sounds riveting.

"Plus if I hear Ford one more time about how sensitive Wanderer is I will put my foot so far up his ass that I’ll play soccer with his tonsils."

So Meyer still is under the disillusion that if she repeats something enough, we'll start to believe it? XD Best. Threat. EVER!
Miss Shaolinashaolina on July 4th, 2010 03:12 am (UTC)
Sweetie, I can't find the lulz in this so far (I'm a bit worried my Host spork is not being fun because of that). This is more repetitive than Twilight so far. Also, everyone is an expy. Ford is Carlisle if he went on and on about how sensitive Bella is. The Seeker is Jane, down to the small smile at the idea of inflicting pain to others.

XD I just got so pissed at seeing this guy again. And it is him, even if it doesn't say so. Darren didn't go on and on about how sensible Wanderer is. I hope he goes away soon. I can't stand the guy at all.
zelda_queenzelda_queen on July 4th, 2010 02:14 pm (UTC)
Well, best of luck with it! I've never read the thing before, so I don't know if it improves or not. Fingers crossed! XD
aikateriniaikaterini on July 4th, 2010 03:00 pm (UTC)
I loved your pie chart. I wonder if somebody made one for "Twilight" as well. XD
Miss Shaolinashaolina on July 4th, 2010 09:49 pm (UTC)
Glad you like it. XD That pie chart is this whole chapter. I really hope we get something different next chapter.