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08 August 2010 @ 04:45 pm
Evermore, chapter 2  
In which the love interest appears and everyone wants to hump him. Are you surprised?

 

Chapter Two

Seconds before Mr. Robins walks in, I lower my hood, click off my iPod, and pretend I'm reading my book, not bothering to look up when he says, "Class, this is Damen Auguste.

>Am I the only one reading Damn August?

 He just moved here from, New Mexico. Okay Damen, you can take that empty seat in the back, right next to Ever. You'll have to share her book until you get your own copy."

Damen is gorgeous.

>Well that’s a surprise! And here I thought he would be cute with a nice personality.

I know this without once looking up. I just focus on my book as he makes his way toward me since I know way too much about my classmates already. So as far as I'm concerned, an extra moment of ignorance really is bliss.

But according to the inner most thoughts of Stacia Miller sitting just two rows before me—Damen Auguste is totally smoking hot.

>Wait a minute! Didn’t you say last chapter that you could relax in the classroom? Um, hello, continuity?

Her best friend, Honor, completely agrees.

> Honor? Really? So we have Ever, Haven, a guy whose name sounds like “Damn August” and now Honor? What the fuck was in the water their parents drank before naming them?  

So does Honor's boyfriend, Craig, but that's a whole other story.

>  He wanted to add him to his list.

"Hey." Damen slides onto the seat next to mine, my backpack making a muffled thud as he drops it to the floor.

> (Ever) Be careful! I have the severed head of my last partner in there.

I nod, refusing to look any further than his sleek, black, motorcycle boots. The kind that are more GQ than Hell's Angel. The kind that look very out of place among the rows of multi colored flip-flops currently gracing the green-carpeted floor.

> The kind that come from a day of shopping and buying tight pants.

Mr. Robins asks us all to turn our books to page 133, prompting Damen to lean in and say, "Mind if I share?"

>(Ever) Matter if I don’t?

I hesitate, dreading the proximity, but sliding my book all the way over until it's teetering off the edge of my desk. And when he moves his chair closer, bridging the small gap between us, I scoot to the farthest part of my seat and hide beneath my hood.

He laughs under his breath, but since I've yet to look at him, I have no idea what it means. All I know is that it sounded light and amused, but like it held something more.

I sink even lower, cheek on palm, eyes on the clock. Determined to ignore all the withering glances and critical comments directed my way. Stuff like: Poor hot, sexy, gorgeous new guy, having to sit next to that freak!

>Wow, poor English teacher. Even if for emphasis, why use three synonyms? At least describe three different aspects that show equally hotness. This could have been a good opportunity to introduce several characteristics serving as temptation for Ever as she begins to make a mental picture.

That emanates from Stacia, Honor, Craig, and just about everyone else in the room.

> So is Craig the only other guy in the classroom or is every guy gay? And really, everyone? This is the Bella effect all over again. I assure you not everyone would care, and even if they did it wouldn’t last all 40 minutes. Not everyone is that obsessive!

Well, all except for Mr. Robins, who wants class to end almost as much as me.

* * *

> Did somebody just shoot at the text?

By lunch, everyone's talking about Damen.

> Of course! It’s not like there was a new episode of Supernatural/Mythbusters/Big Bang theory on last night, new movies are coming in next week, there’s a test on the afternoon and half the class didn’t study and Cindy tripped on the hall as she was carrying a cake and it landed on the principal’s face. No, nothing interesting is going on aside from this one guy being here.  

Have you seen that new kid Damen? He's so hot—So sexy—I heard he's from Mexico—No I think it's Spain—Whatever, it's some foreign place—

>Wow. Ladies and gentlemen, I present you the product of American high schools. 

I'm totally asking him to Winter Formal—You don't even know him yet—Don't worry I will—

"Omigod. Have you seen that new kid, Damen?" Haven sits beside me, peering through her growing-out bangs, their spiky tips ending just shy of her dark red lips.

"Oh please, not you too." I shake my head and bite into my apple.

>Ok, seriously, is this a real book or Twilight AU fanfiction? Or are all YA supernatural romance novels the same?

"You would so not be saying that if you'd been privileged enough to actually see him," she says, removing her vanilla cupcake from its pink cardboard box, licking the frosting right off the top in her usual lunch time routine, even though she dresses more like someone who'd rather drink blood than eat tiny little sweet cakes.

> Why is this such a big deal? Goths eat cakes and every other types of food. This recurrent description of Haven’s behavior vs “style” just makes me want to shake her and call her poser.

"Are you guys talking about Damen?" Miles whispers, sliding onto the bench and placing his elbows on the table, his brown eyes darting between us, his baby face curving into a grin. "Gorgeous! Did you see the boots? So Vogue.

> Nah, more like The Modern Dandy.

 I think I'll invite him to be my next boyfriend."

>Is every guy in this school gay?

Haven gazes at him with narrowed, yellow eyes. "Too late, I called dibs."

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were into non-Goths." He smirks, rolling his eyes as he unwraps his sandwich.

Haven laughs. "When they look like that I am. I swear he's just so freaking smoldering,

>He’s burning sluggishly, without flame and much smoke? I swear, of all the words to use. Did the author just looked hot in a thesaurus and picked one at random? Why not cute, since Haven is all giggles and snorts? Or use a simile of sorts? 

 you have to see him." She shakes her head, annoyed that I can't join in on the fun. "He's like—combustible!"

>You know, both smoldering and combustible can be used to describe a bad temper. Maybe I’m being unfair and this is the author telling us how much of a jerkass is Damen. 

"You haven't seen him?" Miles grips his sandwich and gapes at me.

>  (Miles) You freak! How dare you not stare at the new student and make him feel uncomfortable like the rest of us?!

I gaze down at the table, wondering if I should just lie. They're making such a big deal I'm thinking it's my only way out. Only I can't. Not to them. Haven and Miles are my best friends. My only friends. And I feel like I'm keeping enough secrets already.

> (Ever) Just yesterday I ate Haven’s brownies and blamed her dog. I can’t believe she belied me considering what happens to dogs after eating mass amounts of chocolate.

"I sat next to him in English," I finally say. "We were forced to share a book. But I didn't really get a good look."

"Forced?" Haven moves her bangs to the side, allowing for an unobstructed view of the freak who'd dare say such a thing.

> I get it; you’re a freak because you walk around with a hood and headphones. Stop calling yourself that! Repetition just makes me not believe you.

 “Oh that must have been awful for you, that must've really sucked."

> (Ever) You weren’t there. He bent my book, marked the margins and worst of all… he had cheetoes on his fingers. I think I’ll never recover.

She rolls her eyes and sighs. "I swear, you have no idea how lucky you are. And you don't even appreciate it."

> Why? Just because he’s hot? For all she knows he insulted her or acted like a complete jerk? Why aren’t you asking her what happened instead of insulting her because she’s not joining the “Damen is hot” parade.

"Which book?" Miles asks, as though the title will somehow reveal something meaningful.

> Romeo and Juliet?

"Wuthering Heights." I shrug, placing my apple core on the center of my napkin and folding the edges all around.

> Damn! So close.  I should really make a drinking game out of this novel.

"And your hood? Up or down?" Haven asks.

> (Ever) Upside-down actually.

I think back, remembering how I raised it right as he moved toward me. "Um, Up," I tell her. "Yeah, definitely up." I nod.

"Well thank you for that," she mumbles, breaking her vanilla cupcake in half. "The last thing I need is competition from the blonde goddess."

> Aphrodite?

I cringe and gaze down at the table. I get embarrassed when people say things like that.

>You better tell your author to stop it then.

 Apparently, I used to live for that kind of thing, but not anymore. "Well, what about Miles? You don't think he's competition?" I say, diverting the attention away from me, and back on someone who can truly appreciate it.

"Yeah." Miles runs his hand through his short brown hair and turns, gracing us with his very best side. "Don't rule it out."

"Totally moot," Haven says, dusting white crumbs from her lap. "Damen and Miles don't play for the same team. Which means his oh so devastating, model quality looks, don't count."

> How do you know that?! Considering how camp this series is being I will say a stylish pretty boy does sound like he would be the star pitcher.

"How do you know whose team he's on?" Miles asks, twisting the cap off his vitamin water and narrowing his gaze. "How can you be so sure?"

"Gaydar," she says, tapping her forehead.

>Yes, because everyone knows there is no more exact science than the gaydar. This comes double from the twat who plays the game of “guess who” seriously.

 "And trust me, this guy does not register."

>Maybe he’s a lurker.

* * *

> Who wants to play a game of Jacks?

Not only is Damen in my first period English class, and my sixth period Art class (not that he sat by me, and not that I looked, but the thoughts swirling around the room, even from our teacher, Ms. Machado, told me everything I needed to know),

> I officially hate stories with psychics and new hot students. Can I get something else?

but now he'd apparently parked next to me too. And even though I'd managed to avoid viewing anything more than his boots, I knew my grace period had just come to an end.

"Omigod, there he is! Right directly next to us!" Miles squeals, in the high-pitched, sing-songy whisper he saves for life's most exciting moments.

>Like your favorite bookstore having a sale, finding $20 on the floor or that Wilson/House is canon.

"And check out that ride—shiny black BMW,

> At least it's not a Volvo. But great, he’s rich too, I bet.

extra dark tinted windows, nice, very nice. Okay, so here's the deal, I'm going to open my door and accidentally bump it into his, so then I'll have an excuse to talk to him." He turns, awaiting my consent.

"Do not scratch my car. Or his car. Or any other car," I say, shaking my head, and retrieving my keys.

"Fine." He pouts. "Shatter my dream, whatever

>Because damaging property is truly the key to a man’s maybe not gay heart.

 But just do yourself a favor and check him out! And then look me in the eye and tell me he doesn't make you want to freak out and faint."

I roll my eyes and squeeze between my car and the poorly parked VW Bug that's angled so awkwardly it looks like it's trying to mount my Miata. And just as I'm about to unlock the door, Miles yanks down my hood, swipes my sunglasses, and runs to the passenger side where he urges me, via not so subtle head tilts and thumb jabs, to look at Damen who's standing behind him.

>My lord, what’s with this jerk?! She doesn’t want to see him, why are you forcing her?

So I do. I mean, it's not like I can avoid it forever. So I take a deep breath and look.

And what I see leaves me unable to speak, blink, or move.

>(Ever) It even made me unable to control my heart beat, my nail biting nor my bowels.  

And even though Miles starts waving at me, glaring at me, and basically giving me every signal he can think of to abort the mission and return to headquarters—I can't. I mean, I'd like to, because I know I'm acting like the freak everyone's already convinced that I am, but it's completely impossible.

>Considering how everyone’s been acting, I think you are behaving like every other creepy, shallow, squealing fangirl this school has to offer. Hardly freak material anymore.

And it's not just because Damen is undeniably beautiful, with his shiny dark hair that hits just shy of his shoulders and curves around his high-sculpted cheekbones, but when he looks at me, when he lifts his dark sunglasses and meets my gaze, I see that his almond shaped eyes are deep, dark, and strangely familiar, framed by lashes so lush they almost seem fake. And his lips! His lips are ripe and inviting with a perfect Cupid's bow. And the body that holds it all up is long, lean, tight, and clad in all black.

> Long conditioned hair, stylish shoes, girly eyelashes, puckered lips and fabulous style and pretty boy mannerisms? My lord, he is so camp gay. If I didn’t know better I would wish Miles luck

"Um, Ever? Hel-lo? You can wake up now. Please." Miles turns to Damen, laughing nervously. "Sorry about my friend here, she usually has her hood on."

> (Miles) We’re thinking of upgrading it to a full sack to hide her ugly face.

It's not like I don't know I have to stop. I need to stop right now. But Damen's eyes are fixed on mine, and their color grows deeper as his mouth begins to curve.

> He has amber eyes that change color? (groan) I really need to make a drinking game out if this.

But it's not his complete gorgeousness that has me so transfixed. It has nothing to do with that. It's mainly the way the entire area surrounding his body, starting from his glorious head and going all the way down to the square cut toes of his black motorcycle boots, consists of nothing but blank empty space.

No color. No aura. No pulsing light show.

>Don’t worry, Ever. (Ha ha ha, c wat I did ther? ) Shallow love interests are the black holes of interesting story telling. .. … … You know, I have to say I’m surprised we haven’t had a pun with her name yet.   

* * *

>Next, on Dancing with the stars, we present the conga line.

Everyone has an aura. Every living being has swirls of color emanating from their body. A rainbow energy field they're not even aware of. And it's not like it's dangerous, or scary, or in anyway bad, it's just part of the visible (well, to me anyway) magnetic field.

Before the accident I didn't even know about things like that. And I definitely wasn't able to see it. But from the moment I woke in the hospital, I noticed color everywhere.

"Are you feeling okay?" The red haired nurse asked, gazing down anxiously.

"Yes, but why are you all pink?"

>(Ever) It clashes something awful with your hair.

 I squinted, confused by the pastel glow that enveloped her.

"Why am I what?" She struggled to hide her alarm.

"Pink. You know, it's all around you, especially your head."

>  (Ever) Are you wearing Disney princess body glitter?

"Okay sweetheart, you just rest and I'll go get the doctor," she'd said, backing out of the room and running down the hall.

It wasn't until after I'd been subjected to a barrage of eye exams, brain scans, and psych evals, that I learned to keep the color wheel sightings to myself. And by the time I started hearing thoughts, getting life stories by touch, and enjoying regular visits with my dead sister, Riley, I knew better than to share.

>She sees dead people too? Book, don’t you think you are overpowering your main character from the get go?

I guess I'd gotten so used to living like this, I'd forgotten there was another way. But seeing Damen outlined by nothing more than the shiny black paint job on his expensive cool car, is a vague reminder of happier, more normal days.

"Ever, right?" Damen says, his face warming into a smile, revealing just another one of his perfections—dazzling white teeth.

> Did he just dazzled her? Ok, why haven’t I heard of lawsuits over this? There’s sharing common tropes and then there’s trying to get on the cashcow.

I stand there, willing my eyes to leave his, as Miles makes a show of clearing his throat. And remembering how he hates to be ignored, I motion toward him and say, "Oh, sorry. Miles, Damen, Damen, Miles." And the whole time my eyes never once waver.

Damen glances at Miles, nodding briefly before focusing back on me. And even though I know this sounds crazy, for the split second his eyes moved away, I felt strangely cold and weak.

>Did Ever go to Bella Swan’s school of “happiness comes only from a guy”? I swear if it were to turn into that I will beat her so hard they will have to call this book Nevermore.

But the moment his gaze returns, it's all warm and good again. "Can I ask a favor?" He smiles. "Would you lend me your copy of Wuthering Heights? I need to get caught up and I won't have time to visit the bookstore tonight."

>There are plenty of bookstores that close late. The one at my favorite mall closes at midnight and opens at 8am. Besides, can’t you just read it online?

I reach into my backpack, retrieve my dog-eared copy, and dangle it from the tips of my fingers, part of me yearning to brush the tips against his, to make contact with this beautiful stranger, while the other part, the stronger, wiser, psychic part cringes—dreading the awful flash of insight that comes with each touch.

But it's not until he's tossed the book into his car, lowered his sunglasses, and said, "Thanks, see you tomorrow," that I realize that other than a slight tingle in the tips of my fingers, nothing happened. And before I can even respond, he's backing out of the space and driving away.

> And so Ever obsesses over the one person of the opposite sex that is immune to her mind reading. Reading this is like watching The legend of the Titanic.

"Excuse me," Miles says, shaking his head as he climbs in beside me. "But when I said you'd freak out when you saw him, it wasn't a suggestion, it wasn't supposed to be taken literally. Seriously Ever, what happened back there? Because that was some mega tense awkwardness, a real—Hello, my name is Ever and I'll be your next stalker—kind of moment.

> Yeah! Next thing we know you’ll climb up his bedroom window.

I'm so serious, I thought we were gonna have to resuscitate you. And believe me, you are extremely lucky our good friend Haven was not here to see that, because I hate to remind you, but she did call dibs—"

>Then why the hell did you make her see him. She was doing fine avoiding him.

Miles continues like that, yammering on and on, the entire way home. But I just let him talk it out, as I navigate traffic, my finger absently tracing the thick red scar on my forehead, the one that's hidden under my bangs.

> (Ever)Why do I feel like a dark wizard is near?

I mean, how can I explain how ever since the accident, the only people whose thoughts I can't hear, whose lives I can't know, and whose auras I can't see, are already dead?

> And loving it, baby!



And with that I end Evermore... unless I get the book. Then again I could always just read Midnight Sun. It's so similar I might as well. Until then, this is Shaolina signing out.

(Chapter 3)
 
 
Feeling: calmcalm
 
 
 
Gehayi: abbysidesmile (abbysciuto)gehayi on August 9th, 2010 01:05 am (UTC)
I'm reading his first name as "Damien." You know, the Antichrist from The Omen trilogy.

Also, how did Craig get into a class with Ever, Haven, Damn August and Honor?

So is Craig the only other guy in the classroom or is every guy gay?

I'm guessing that Damien is so supposed to be so hot that Even The Guys Want Him. This works a LOT better in a visual medium than in a book.

Are all YA supernatural romance novels are the same?

From what I can tell, yes, they are.

This recurrent description of Haven’s behavior vs “style” just makes me want to shake her and call her poser.

I just think of Haven as a Perky Goth like Abby Sciuto, which is perfectly all right. The one who bugs me is Ever, who keeps insisting that Haven is UNUSUAL for being able to enjoy things that are not traditionally thought of as associated with the goth lifestyle. There are lots of different kinds of goths, Ever! Stop fussing about it!

he’s rich too, I bet.

Of course he is. The eternal immortal paranormal beings inexplicably attending high school with children centuries their junior are ALWAYS rich. How they're managing to STAY rich when they don't do anything to actually earn money, I have no clue.

Damen is undeniably beautiful, with his shiny dark hair that hits just shy of his shoulders and curves around his high-sculpted cheekbones, but when he looks at me, when he lifts his dark sunglasses and meets my gaze, I see that his almond shaped eyes are deep, dark, and strangely familiar, framed by lashes so lush they almost seem fake. And his lips! His lips are ripe and inviting with a perfect Cupid's bow. And the body that holds it all up is long, lean, tight, and clad in all black.

Dear God, it's Thomas Raith as a teenager. Look at the description if you don't believe me.

I need to get caught up and I won't have time to visit the bookstore tonight.

Ever: Have you considered visiting the school library? It should have a few copies.

Damen: No, I want yours.

Ever: And of course there's also one-day shipping from Amazon.com, if you really want to buy it. Until UPS drops off the book tomorrow, you can read it at www.online-literature.org.

Damen: But I want--

Ever: Or Project Gutenberg.

Damen: But--

Ever: Bye!

Seriously, none of this is original. This is Twilight genderswap fic.
Miss Shaolinashaolina on August 9th, 2010 01:45 am (UTC)
First of all, holy cow I have a horrible grammar mistake. Must fix it now! Anyway...

Wow, how did I miss that name? Considering his soul is an undead hole of darkness and all that. I just kept thinking back to August since I do this by first impression.

And I'm sure there must be one YA supernatural romance novel out there that is decent. I just need to ask all my YA loving friends which book they all hate since they all think Twilight, Marked and this one are good books. -_-; I heard one of them mentioning a book call Fallen and Let the right one in (I think?). Maybe those are better?

"Even guys/girls want him/her" works in literature when you are made of awesome. I have an asexual crush on Adora Belle from Discworld because she is just so damn wonderful and badass. I also have a male straight friend who loves Sherlock Holmes a bit too much. But so far I'm getting nothing from Damen. He's just SOOOO pretty and that's it. .

You are right on Ever though, I'll give you that. As I pointed out, plenty of goths eat lots of food. Some are even vegetarian, so there goes "the blood and guts." People are more than just the box they fit into. (Although the evil sign was so Nickelodeon that it made me facepalm.)I still think a more subdued perkiness would have worked wonders on her. I love perkiness when it's charming (like Charlotte from PatF and Miss Hisselpenny from the Parasol Protectorate series) and the author really needs to improve on that.

Ever also has the annoying habit of calling herself a freak because she wears a hood and headphones, which pisses me off. Unless she grows a second head or a hump, she's not a freak. Even more so when she gets called "the blonde goddess". It's like Bella calling herself ugly when she has 5 guys after her.

I love your script. In this day and age when pretty much everything is on the net, couldn't he get such a classic novel online? I read No Exit online not so long ago.

And double on the Twilight. This is so Midnight Sun it's ridiculous. I can understand one or two things in common, lots of books share common tropes, but the levels in this book just scream "trying to milk the cashcow"
Gehayi: vampire harry (potterpuffs)gehayi on August 9th, 2010 02:56 am (UTC)
Adora Belle is wonderful. I commend you for your good taste. And yeah, you can make it work in literature if you're a good writer and/or if the story is good. This book, however...no chance.

I heard one of them mentioning a book call Fallen and Let the right one in (I think?).

I've heard of the movie Let the Right One In. I didn't know it was a book as well, but apparently it is. Marked sounds like it's about a boarding school for vampires; again, I've never heard of it, so I can't tell you what it's like. It sounds interesting enough for me to give it a shot, at any rate.

Based on this very thorough review, I'd say that Fallen is basically Twilight set in a reform school with the latest incarnation of a stalker angel and his reincarnated Twu Wuv instead of a centuries-old stalker vampire and his virginal Twu Wuv.

(As a note, I do not like authors to sexualize angel characters. Authors who sexualize angels AND throw out all the myths associated with them just make me wince.)

I still think a more subdued perkiness would have worked wonders on her. I love perkiness when it's charming (like Charlotte from PatF and Miss Hisselpenny from the Parasol Protectorate series) and the author really needs to improve on that.

I agree that a less...intense perkiness would have been better. But that would have involved subtlety, and we can't have that, can we?

Ever also has the annoying habit of calling herself a freak because she wears a hood and headphones, which pisses me off.

*sigh* Sadly, I recognize this ploy from my years of sporking Sues. Suethors love to insist that their practically perfect creations are DEEPLY DEEPLY FLAWED, because that gives them an excuse to have the other characters insist, "Oh, no! Your face/voice/body/dancing/fashion sense/courage/inner strength is the most wonderful that I've ever seen!"

This is reassuring to people who identify with Sues. If the Sue is that wonderful, then the reader who identifies with her must be as well. And unfortunately there are a lot of girls out there who have no sense of self apart from what others tell them they are.

Also, Miles, just ask Damen out, will you? I can tell that you're dying to.

In this day and age when pretty much everything is on the net, couldn't he get such a classic novel online? I read No Exit online not so long ago.

He could. In multiple languages, and with summaries, essays and study guides to go with it. As you said, it's really not that hard to read a book online nowadays. Lacking a book might have been a crisis in the days before the Internet. But not now.

Also, if you want to see how Evermore turns out, check here.



Edited at 2010-08-09 02:57 am (UTC)
(Anonymous) on August 9th, 2010 03:10 am (UTC)
Marked and Let The Right One In
Hey, It's Valkyrie. I had to comment on this ;).
Ahhhh, Marked.
I hate it. That's just my opinion, though.
Let The Right One In? Search the title on Scribd (.com) and you'll find the book with a blurry cover of a black haired girl in a red sweater, running. Beautiful, REAL, vampire book. Beautiful, REAL, vampire movie. About a bullied 12 year old boy Osker, and a 12 year old vampire girl, Eli. The movie almost lives up to the book but I heard they're making an American version called Let Me In that doesn't look as great. Should still be good, though.
Miss Shaolinashaolina on August 9th, 2010 04:02 am (UTC)
Re: Marked and Let The Right One In
I'll check it out then. I'm dying for a good YA book. I don't like hating on a whole section, but there's nothing good in there as far as I know.
aikateriniaikaterini on August 10th, 2010 05:11 pm (UTC)
Re: Marked and Let The Right One In
Yes, the movie was awesome. I haven't read the whole book, but I hear that it's also great. I really don't know why Hollywood is making a remake of the film (especially since it's so soon after the original came out), but I hope that it's good.
Miss Shaolinashaolina on August 9th, 2010 03:50 am (UTC)
Thank you. Ah, Adora Belle could step on me for all I care. She's just that awesome. When she finally shows up in Making Money with all those golems and shrugs Moist's worries away all I wanted was to get in the book and hug her.

Marked I'm going to do starting tomorrow if all goes well. It doesn't seem like a Twilight rip off at least, but the main character's voice annoy me for some reason. With the little I read I just wanted to set it on fire. I should have known when I told my best friend that I was going to read it and she ended up laughing for ten minutes and said "Yeah, let me know how that goes." But she thought until Soulless that Twilight was good so I figured if she hated it it had to be decent.

And aren't angels sexless?

Honestly, if the author showed more, had a better pacing, subtle characters and a less whiny protagonist this story wouldn't be so bad (well, as far as these 2 chapters). The author feels extremely lazy.

And I honestly can't deal with characters made for self insert. I love my characters gray, honestly screwed up or flawed and interesting. I try to understand how somebody can connect to Bella or Ever here and I can't see it. They are boring so by that logic I would call myself boring. I like to think I'm at least fun and a bit interesting.

I can only guess the book thing is an excuse to make them talk later. Again, lazy writing! This feels like bad Twilight fanfiction, and considering that Twilight already reads like bad fanfiction...

I won't read the summary though, in case I find a copy and decide to move on. Before I did these two chapters all I knew about this series I learned from a friend at a book store when she showed me book 3 or 4 to me and I read a paragraph. I almost died of laughter at how bad it was. I did a dramatic reading and everything in there.
Gehayi: buffy and kendra (xjubesx)gehayi on August 9th, 2010 04:32 am (UTC)
And aren't angels sexless?

Oh, yes, traditionally they're supposed to be. But in paranormals...well, I guess you haven't run into the horror of sexualized angels yet? It's a fairly big sub-genre. I've picked up a large number of books that seemed fairly decent, only to find that it features some angel (always gorgeous, of course, as that is sloppy shorthand in romantic fiction for "this is a good person") who has been exiled from Heaven for some offense (and yeah, I KNOW that would be a fallen angel, a.k.a. a demon--just go with it) and who has to learn to love/find someone who can accept and love him as the angel he is/find his true love who has been separated from him by Heaven-Fate-war in Heaven-Destiny-circumstances-Fill In The Blank. It is weird how the angels in these stories come from Paradise and serve a God who is supposedly the incarnation of love and yet know nothing of love and are incomplete without humans. I mean, I'm an agnostic, but I know the backstory that angels come with. Sheesh.

And I honestly can't deal with characters made for self insert. I love my characters gray, honestly screwed up or flawed and interesting. I try to understand how somebody can connect to Bella or Ever here and I can't see it. They are boring so by that logic I would call myself boring. I like to think I'm at least fun and a bit interesting.

A-FREAKING-MEN. THANK YOU.

I can only guess the book thing is an excuse to make them talk later. Again, lazy writing!

Because there's nothing else they could possibly talk about. He couldn't ask her why she wears the hood up all the time, and if its a fashion statement. He couldn't ask why she won't look at anyone, or why, if she's shy, she goes out of her way to make herself noticeable. They can't talk about music, movies, TV shows, books, how much the school football team sucks, how much they hate Ms. Dickens' sadistic habit of giving surprise quizzes in calc, or what it was like where he lived before, how tired Damen is of trying to explain to various computerized businesses that his first name is spelled with an E and not with an O, how tired Ever is of all the puns based on her name, or even how much Heathcliff and Cathy suck as a romantic couple. Which they do. If Damen and Ever had two brain cells between them, they could talk about almost anything. But they don't. Feh. No imagination.
Miss Shaolinashaolina on August 10th, 2010 08:36 pm (UTC)
Wow, that book sounds kinda bad. Especially the fallen angel that isn't a demon (Satan myth says he was gorgeous and a fallen again) I feel like questing for decent YA books because very one I've heard about is bad. Is there anything worthwhile in that section?


And why would we need them really talking? We are Ever and Damen is gorgeous! He is so hot he's made out of 100 George Foreman grills. Things like chemistry and personality are for losers.
aikateriniaikaterini on August 10th, 2010 05:10 pm (UTC)
Thanks for the link. I liked her reviews of "Hush, Hush" (man, was that an awful book) and "City of Bones" (which was also awful). I just don't understand why these authors try to make it seem that their male love interests are sexy, attractive, bad boys when they're *not.* Jace, Patch, and Damen don't make me want to swoon; they make me want to throw books at them.

And what the heck is up with the names "Jace" and "Patch?" Patch is not exactly a name that I would associate with an angel or a demon (I don't know if that's supposed to be the point, but still) and I still think that the name "Jace" is stupid.
Gehayigehayi on August 10th, 2010 05:50 pm (UTC)
And what the heck is up with the names "Jace" and "Patch?" Patch is not exactly a name that I would associate with an angel or a demon (I don't know if that's supposed to be the point, but still) and I still think that the name "Jace" is stupid.

I don't know what's up with the name "Patch." It sounds like the name of a calico cat. (Or, y'know, Patch Adams. And neither the real life version nor the Robin Williams one is remotely sexy.)

I think I know where Clare got the name "Jace" from, though. See, City of Bones was originally a Harry Potter story. The part of Jace was played by Draco Malfoy. I figure that when she shaved the serial numbers off of her fanfic, she realized that there were other blond, gray-eyed boys in the world--but that she couldn't call him Drake, or Drakeson, or Dragon, or any of the myriad variations fanficcers have come up with for Draco already. So I figure she chopped off the first two letters, changed the O to an E, and then tried to figure out possible first letters.

"Ace? No, no. That'll make people think of Ace Rimmer in Red Dwarf. Bace? No one will know it's pronounced 'Base,' and once people figure it out I'll have to deal with all those 'all your base' jokes. Cace? It looks like 'caca.' NO. Dace? Too close to Draco. Eace? Oh, come on. Face? Not unless he's working for the A-Team. Gace? Looks too much like Gacy. I don't want my hero named after a serial killer! Hace? Iace? Lace? Great name for a bad boy, right. Mace? Not unless his last name is Windu. Nace? Oace? Pace? Pace is too Dawson's Creek. And I don't think I could get away with calling him Race even if that wasn't pretty close to Draco. Quace? Sace? Tace? Vace? Oh, there must be something I've forgotten...Jace! That sounds like a name! And if anyone asks, it's short for Jason! That'll work!"

Bet you dollars to doughnuts that that's how it happened.

Also, you might like bookshop's take on Hush, Hush and rape culture.





Edited at 2010-08-10 05:51 pm (UTC)
aikateriniaikaterini on August 10th, 2010 07:46 pm (UTC)
*snorts in laughter*

Well, in the book, Jace explains that he created his name by combining the first letters of "Jonathan" and "Christopher." J.C. = Jace, apparently. (And if left in the hands of Stephenie Meyer, who is a fan of Cassandra Claire's works, his name would probably be "Jonathopher" or something similarly ridiculous.) But your version is funnier.

P.S. I must thank you once again for a link. Her essay was thought-provoking, depressing, and brilliant. It pinpointed exactly why I hated "Hush, Hush" so much (although I'm surprised that she didn't go in detail about Patch's "villainous" ex-girlfriend and about the double standards there).
Gehayigehayi on August 10th, 2010 08:10 pm (UTC)
Regrettably, we can't blame Stephenie Meyer alone for coming up with weird names. There seems to be something in the water in Utah. Check the Cream of the Crop page at the Utah Baby Namer. I'll C & P a few categories right now for flavoring.

Faux ethnic: Laddie, Walkasheaqua, Bsjonet, Hishla, Chilnecha, Forthilda, Kaltighanna, Alainka, Chip-wa, Pawnece America, Zem Saxon, O'Ann, WaThene, Sheighlagh, Valliere, Reaux, El Myrrh.

Commemorating something or another: Bridger A-10, Welcome Exile, Confederate American, Southern Justice, Diksi, Liberty Lulu, Young Elizabeth, MistiNoele, Imagine, Thankful Flood, Friends Forsaken, Joyous Noel, Tennyson, Knight Train, Miracles Precious One, Sunday's Hoseana, Disney, Blessing Ream, Stormy Shepherd, Denim Levi, Vernal Independence, Sincere Devotion, Mothers, Elvoid, Noah-Lot, Mormon Miracles, MyLae, Nightrain Lane, Zion Anakin, Jeopardee, Statehood, Timberland Miner, Slate Canyon, Lucky Blue, Christmas Contada, Vilar Bodily, MyLiege Elite, Echo Pawnee.

Under the circumstances, I can see why Stephenie Meyer thinks that Renesmee Carlie Cullen is a perfectly normal name.

although I'm surprised that she didn't go in detail about Patch's "villainous" ex-girlfriend and about the double standards there

You're welcome, and yeah. That just makes it TRIPLY odious, doesn't it? I think that this is worse than Meyer, because Meyer is stupid and doesn't realize that stalking does not equal true love. The author of Hush, Hush does realize that stalking isn't love--she simply doesn't care. And she'll use it to shoehorn her characters into a romance if it kills her.
(Anonymous) on August 9th, 2010 02:44 am (UTC)
IIIIIIIIIt's Valkyrie!
Well of course he's totally gay -flips hair, is obnoxious- his name is, like, CRAIG, and -still realy obnoxious- you know, like, everyone with the mane CRAIG is, like, totes GAY. I mean, DUH!





Lol.
zelda_queenzelda_queen on August 9th, 2010 02:18 am (UTC)
"Did somebody just shoot at the text?"

XD

And is it just me, or does this all seem vaguely...gross? Like the way the characters are described, I feel kind of sick. And I don't mean "this is so sappy" sick, I mean like "stop talking about spittle" sick. Maybe it's just me. O_o
Miss Shaolinashaolina on August 9th, 2010 02:31 am (UTC)
XD I like that joke, although my favorite one was the Phineas and Ferb joke back in part one.

This makes me more annoyed than sick. I just found out this was published in 2009. The lack of originality astounds me and the execution is terrible. The first chapter is one huge info dump and the second one is just Midnight Sun chapter one with gender swap. I have half a mind to track this down and add it to my sporking list. I've got the feeling it just gets worst.

Seriously, can anybody write a half decent YA fantasy novel?!
zelda_queenzelda_queen on August 9th, 2010 03:04 am (UTC)
There are a few, but seriously, you're right. Every time I'm in Barnes and Noble, I like to poke around the YA section, for research purposes. Almost half of the stuff there is Twilight knock-offs, right down to the cover. Most of the other half are "Pride and Prejudice and Zombie" knock-offs, which are actually kind of cool.
Miss Shaolinashaolina on August 9th, 2010 04:01 am (UTC)
If you find a good one let me know. Every good YA novel I know could be easily from the children's section too. Like The Graveyard book (Which I adore) or Howl's moving castle (which I like). Then there's the Tiffany series by Terry Pratchett and the Lois Lowry books, which are ok. HP is also ok and, again, it's in the kid's section.

I like PP and Z, but I'm a sucker for books that make me laugh.

I don't really visit the YA section on my own. Every time a friend has given me a book from there it sucks monkey balls. Yet when I think about Dreams... I have to admit it's a YA book most likely and it weirds me out a bit. XD
(Anonymous) on August 9th, 2010 03:03 am (UTC)
Valkyrie... twice.
Guess what I found! -sings annoyingly like Alice Cullen. It's Midnight Sun Part 2!
I've been digging around a bit, trying to find the rest of Midnight Sun and turns out, it's on Scribd. I don't know if you know of it but here's the url (is that what it's called?) anyway.

http://www.scribd.com/doc/23564774/The-Rest-of-Midnight-Sun-From-chapter-13-till-the-last-chapter

Trust me, it works and only gets worse and worse, but I thought you wouldn't mind knowing about it if you don't already. It's the REAL second half so I don't know if they'll take it off. Probably not. I saved it on a Word file in case :)
Valkyrie, out.
zelda_queenzelda_queen on August 9th, 2010 03:10 am (UTC)
Re: Valkyrie... twice.
I don't think that's the real second half. The author also uploaded Eclipse from Edward's POV and said it wasn't the real deal.
(Anonymous) on August 9th, 2010 03:16 am (UTC)
Re: Valkyrie... twice.
Hmmmm... Not sure. But it sounds so much like the Edward we all despise and wish would die from Midnight Sun. It's craptastic and purple prose filled enough to pass off as the second half... I pity whoever wrote this in their bad writing (including SMeyer).
Miss Shaolinashaolina on August 9th, 2010 03:53 am (UTC)
Re: Valkyrie... twice.
Well my other computer blew up on me, which is why I haven't done MS in a while. I just downloaded the text though. I'll check the one you posted though. I'm sure it's not real, but if it's funny I'm all for doing it too. Thank you for the link, dear.
(Anonymous) on August 9th, 2010 08:13 am (UTC)
Re: Valkyrie... twice.
Cha, just found out... It ain't real :(
And it was so close!
Full of stalkering, obssesive, sappy romance that we all just LOVED in Midnight Sun. -sarcasm-
Peace, Valkrie.
aikateriniaikaterini on August 10th, 2010 05:58 pm (UTC)
You're right, this sounds so much like "Twilight" and it's the only the second chapter! Gehayi's right; this really is "Twilight" gender-swapped.

/> Honor? Really? So we have Ever, Haven, a guy whose name sounds like “Damn August” and now Honor? What the fuck was in the water their parents drank before naming them?/

Unless they wanted to give their children "special" names like celebrities so often do.

I love how Miles, Ever's gay friend, squeals and has a "high-pitched, sing-song" voice. So progressive, aren't you, Ms. Noel? *sarcasm*

And I also love how Haven and Miles are supposed to be Ever's best friends, but so far they've acted like anything but. They've done nothing but drool over Damen at the expense of paying attention to Ever, pressure her to talk to him when she doesn't want to, act like it's such a crime that she's not going gaga over him like they are, and then when she finally does manage to talk to him, complain that she's too awkward and that she's acting like a stalker. Even though, by the way they've been going on about him, *they* could qualify as his stalkers! Pot calling the kettle black anyone?

Man, is this how Lauren felt in "Twilight" when everyone was going crazy over Bella? "Gosh, Lauren, what's *wrong* with you? You don't want to hurry over to Bella and bask in her beauty like the rest of us? Bella, Bella, Bella. We all have to talk about Bella. It doesn't matter that, in the real world, we'd talk about her for a grand total of five minutes before moving on to other topics, she's the only thing worth mentioning. Omigosh, she just looked in my direction! Swoon!"
Miss Shaolinashaolina on August 10th, 2010 08:44 pm (UTC)
I know. I was not prepared for all the similarities in this chapter with Midnight Sun and Twilight in general. Not even the host is this similar! I even went to investigate the publishing date of this book and it's 2009. Well, jeez, wonder if this was inspired by something. -_-;

And I know about the pressure thing. I wanted to punch Miles out for that. Even if he doesn't know why Ever is doing it, she's still expressing she doesn't want anything to do with him. Either ask her in a non-B.S. way what's her deal or let her be!

Plus the whole gorgeous thing was so Midnight Sun. The more he got described as hot the uglier he became in my head. A good author doesn't need to beat me over the head with something. I think Miss Noel gushed over his looks in one chapter than Meyer did with Edward for 3.
angel_renoirangel_renoir on January 7th, 2011 05:49 pm (UTC)
LOL this book is totally like Twilight and Midnight Sun put in a blender.

I do wonder though, what's the problem with the asterisk-breaks? I thought it's a pretty normal thing to put a break. Is she just doing it wrong somehow? Are they misplaced?